Picture this.
A little aqua jogging club at a local pool are doing laps. There’s a calm Sunday morning atmosphere, especially because the kids class nearby has just wrapped up, and parents are hustling them away in anticipation of the second coffee of the day.
The little aqua jogging club has a special spot reserved - an area of the pool cordoned off. This morning it consists of a couple of older folks (and me) and there’s lots of congenial nodding as we do our circuit in the pool.
If you’ve never been aqua jogging, it’s the greatest. You get a foam belt to hold you up in the water and then you do what’s on the tin - jog in the water to your heart’s desire, and come out feeling like you’ve run a marathon. The fact you’re forced to “jog” past others in extreme slow motion means a culture of cultivated polite staring off into the distance while smiling slightly to signal respect for the shared mission. You can actively take part while having space to observe and be in your own head - my favourite way to be in the world.
There are signs I notice as I jog. One says “reserved for aqua jogging only.” The other one says “No bombing.”
Bold letters. You can’t miss them.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see a man strut to the edge of the pool overlooking our little aqua jogging group, pausing to survey the landscape directly beneath him with a recognisable intensity.
Now, as a woman who has existed on the planet for a while, men who do this usually have one of two purposes:
1.) They’re trying to look down the front of your togs from above.
2.) They’re about to cannonball.
Thinking it is option one, I turn my back on him and begin to jog the other way.
Seconds later, the man leaps over my head to land just in front of me in the pool, sending water careening into my face and the two older women very close by.
Shocked, we all lock eyes as the man casually swims off without a word or a backward glance at any of us.
Several thoughts go through my mind.
1.) He was close enough to hit one of us.
2.) He was large enough to do serious damage if he had.
3.) He was either oblivious to that fact, or knew and did not care.
3a.) I’m not sure which is worse.
Thus, I have spent the day pondering the psyche of those who act only with their own interests in mind.
And what of the bystanders? The lifeguard, standing next to the “no bombing” sign, did nothing.
I was so shocked that I stood gasping like a fish out of water (or an aqua jogger with nowhere to jog) as the man swam blithely away.
One of the older women, with an arched brow, commented loudly regarding men of a certain age who are clearly grown but unable to grow up.
There’s something to be said for the way we rewarded him with zero consequences or accountability - and something to be said for the fact that nobody knew who was supposed to be holding him accountable.
There’s something to be said for the man who refused to hold himself accountable - grown, but unable to behave in a way that considered anyone else.
A curious thing happened as we all swiped the water from our eyes and tried to dismiss the cannonball as a one off.
A second man observed the first, pondered for a bit, and then did a slightly smaller cannonball into the pool, right next to us.
Permission was granted because no one actively upheld the thing making everyone safe. Cannonballs were now normalised, despite stated values otherwise.
It’s the kind of thing makes you wonder if smaller, more acceptable cannonballs are really going to be the things that save us.
Or, for that matter, uninspiring centrism.
It also makes you wonder if the misogyny and racism that is always just under the surface in NZ has now been given explicit permission.
It makes you wonder if sustained, consistent pressure from the public would ensure leaders work together to stop the cannonballs.
It makes you wonder, if those in favour of cannonballs get enough funding and spread enough misinformation to the wider public, the pro-cannonball vote will get louder than those who know that the cannonballs lead to harm*.
Ultimately, leaders are the ones creating the signs about cannonballing - and either set a culture that means even though the pool is for everyone, they ensure those who can’t withstand a cannonball can use the pool.
Or, allow a culture that means anyone who thinks they have the right to do so can leap without considering who might come to harm.
*The recent misinformation campaign in Australia on amending the Constitution to establish an Indigenous Voice to parliament led to a no. There’s a blueprint to watch for.